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Drunkards will not miss President Ian Khama!

Keletso Thobega



Imagine that you are out and about having a good time at your favourite night joint. The golden juices are swirling in your head as you dance in slow motion, when the music is abruptly turned off and the lights are switched on and off to indicate that it is now closing time. Talk about an anti-climax! But this is apparently the life that drinkers and drunkards have become used to since 2008. For the past several weeks, the president has embarked on a national tour to bid farewell to Batswana after an eventful presidency. There is no doubt that our teetotaller president gained notoriety when he effected the alcohol levy and restricted entertainment hours laws. But it has been proven that there is no correlation between substance abuse and tax.

When people want to do something, they will do it. And Batswana sure as hell want to drink – so much that you would be forgiven for thinking that imbibing the golden liquids is a compulsory cultural practice. I even hear that the chief drunkards want to introduce the gabola church here. But this war against alcohol is understandable. Alcohol is a silent killer: not only detrimental to one’s health if consumed in large amounts but also, most social ills in our communities boil down to alcoholism – poverty, murder, divorce, HIV/AIDS, road carnages and the list goes on.

But some people still choose to drink like fish. It speaks volumes about twisted priorities and how some people have a low self-esteem. There is nothing wrong with alcohol if it is consumed in small amounts – two or three glasses is enough, folks! Some Batswana have adopted this self-defeating culture of thinking drinking to get drunk is something to be praised for. Go na le selo gatwe ‘plaka’. Someone can wipe off a six or 12 pack or more, or a bottle of whisky or wine in just one sitting. Kooteng ke bokwete. Motho wa teng o tla bo a iphitsa dino tsa bagolo, kamoso a bo a ipoka gore ne a bo nwa a sa bo tshamikise…WTF, who does that?! Never mind that you put yourself at risk of alcohol poisoning, inflammation, liver cirrhosis etc…

And need I add that alcoholics are the ugliest lot out there what with their phuza faces. At times you have to squint in the person’s direction to figure out if they are laughing or crying. Anyways, I bet our President would be shocked if he were to be thrown into a drinking hole and come across the assortment of characters. In every drinking hole, there is always the madcap – that one person murmuring to themselves. Then there is the person who enjoys holding centre stage in conversations. Then there is that chap who is broke but always gets drunk because he asks for beers from patrons.

Bo‘ntlaletse hoo.’ Then there is the one with Dutch confidence: they would be quiet as a church mouse but after a few drinks, suddenly develops verbal diarrhoea. Then there are the ones who always get involved in fights: alcohol incites the Muhammad Ali within them. And then enter the classic, the emotional crier. This one opens the floodgates after a few drinks and tells all and sundry about their “problems” which could range from money issues, being bewitched or love woes. Being a man who seemingly cares about people and is concerned with their plight, the Prez would probably listen attentively. The drunk would sob: Monngame, mokapelo o a ntshwenya…gape o gana ka dikobo. And with a concerned look he would respond: A e didimale a bo e latlha bojwalwa…ke tla e fa dikobo!

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Times a changeling’

Ernest Moloi



Botswana is gradually reclaiming herself – not necessarily her innocence; we know she has been battered, raped, abused and dumped! Perhaps in her reawakening, she will learn to cherish the hard won values of national cohesion, which for a fleeting moment, were at risk of slipping right through her fingers.

Batswana are better off – they have the best and worst experiences of the peoples of the world to learn from. For example, we know pretty well that the atrocities, carnage, calamity and mayhem of 1994 in Rwanda in which Hutus and Tutsis tore at each other were not a spontaneous mass action.

Neither were the Holocaust in which Jews were slaughtered not the Nakba, which continues to this day with the every day dispossession of the Palestinian Arabs by the Israeli occupation.
In fact we can deduce a clear pattern from all these heinous experiences that they were borne of wilful actions of men and women – despots of the first order who think nothing about nation building but are puffed up with arrogance and self-aggrandisement.

If we profess love for our country, which is often referred to as ‘Patriotism’, we must jealously guard the founding principles bequeathed us by our patriarchs, the same with which they laid the foundations of this republic – and if need be, we must be prepared to die for these principles. True independence is a hard fought battle – independence is not served on a silver platter; it is earned by a people with a fighting spirit, a people ready to become martyrs if only to safeguard posterity and the future of their children!

This nation has for a very long time been deeply divided – the healing process will be gradual, just as the systemic oppression has been. We were divided into pockets of tribes; and through an inherent desire to belong; to have an identity, we clasped on to these tribal fixations to the extent of subverting our new found republicanism with monarchical demagoguery. And every time real politics challenges our moral foundation we find refuge in these fixations in our search for answers. We must however, thank God, for He has never forsaken us – He has always provided a guidepost when it was required, and this He will continue doing until we come unto a common understanding of His purpose for mankind.

In Setswana, there is the maxim; ‘Go kgoberega ga metsi ke go itsheka ga one’ meaning that conflicts are not permanent features but passing phenomena in human existence. There is a time for everything and indeed there is nothing new under the sun! The greatest lesson we can ever learn is that the human race must love one another and live together. It does not matter what skin pigmentation you or I bear – we are all human/ homo sapiens; that is why we are able to breed across the colour divide.

Therefore this imagined barrier that separates one against the other on the basis of skin pigmentation is a farce for the worst ignoramus. Likewise, we are none the wiser if we allow material wealth to define our human relationships. We must transcend these worldly possessions because they cannot satiate the hunger that the soul yearns for companionship and fellowship with a kindred spirit.

Therefore, we can only hope that Mma V will find it in her motherly heart to let bygones be bygones, to bury the hatchet with her nemesis, President Mokgweetsi Masisi and let sleeping dogs lie in the best interest of the country at this critical juncture. She has it within her power to end this fight. It’s really flabbergasting and incomprehensible that delegates can attend a regional congress; make nominations for presidential candidates and later claim they did not know about the election that followed and in which they were active participants.

This is a classical joke. It gets out of hand when tribal elders then call a political meeting outside the sanction of their party to try and undo the electoral process of a political party. In one word, such meeting is tribal and has nothing whatsoever with political affiliation.

In any case when a ward, cell or branch of a party feels aggrieved it does not seek recourse from the village elders, but instead uses the laid down party structures to resolve the differences. What we witnessed this past weekend was the worst form of tribal politics; a last ditch effort by a vanquished faction that risks becoming irrelevant, to seek public sympathy. Mma V; Ian Khama, Moyo Guma and all the other BaNgwato tribesmen must pick up the pieces and throw their weight behind the leader of the BDP and the nation for both their own good and the good of the country at large.

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On public displays of affection and kissing babies

Keletso Thobega



I was listening to Kim’s show on DumaFM a few weeks ago when she was discussing public displays of affection, commonly referred to as PDA.

I found her views and those of her guest and listeners quite interesting. It is one of those topics that people won’t always agree on. In traditional Botswana, public displays of affection such as kissing and hugging are not common. A handshake or slight touch is as far as it goes. Although things are changing in modern times, Batswana are still not the most affectionate or romantic people, and often refer to certain practices, public affection included as “dilo tsa makgoa.”

I personally don’t mind occasional affection but I am not the ‘touchy huggy’ type. I’m conscious of people getting too close to me because I relish my “space”. I prefer to be affectionate with my loved ones, a few close family and friends. Affection is OK and even research indicates that it is good for one’s mental and psychological well-being. But while a simple hug, pat on the back, slight touch or holding hands is fine; some people take it to different levels and their affection borders on intimacy.

There are people with silly tendencies who seemingly use affection as an opportunity to flirt and entice others sexually. You know those people who are a bit too affectionate, and even if they don’t know someone they’ll be all over them like a rash, motho wa teng a batla go go tlamuka o ipotsa gore o ire jang tota! Motho wa teng o tla bo a susumela, a gagamatsa mmele a nnetse go shenama e ka re o tla re: “A ga re potele ka kwa?”

These random “hugs” are controversial. When the person steps in for a hug, the crotch comes before the body and they hold on tightly, sometimes with their eyes closed and you wonder, is this a hug or foreplay?  Hugging or touching people in a civilised manner is fine if they have no problem with it but there are boundaries. This brings me to the point that we have a social habit of picking up, playing with and kissing babies.

There are ways to amuse or play with a child without kissing them. If the child is not yours… e se wa ko ga lona, please, don’t kiss them. No offence but we don’t know where your lips have been. Children have weaker immune systems so a touch of germs and bacteria can spur illness. I recall this one time I was travelling on a bus and one young lady next to me was seated with her daughter, who was probably two-years old or so. The energetic tot kept the passengers amused with her antics and baby talk. She later got restless and started crying.

Her mother struggled to calm her down. Then this one middle-aged man seated on the opposite seat reached out for the child and started hugging her. He then exclaimed: “Suna papa!” and proceeded to put his dark nicotine-stained mouth to the child’s lips!

He lifted the child and made her wiggle before planting yet another wet kiss on her lips and coddling her. I was horrified! All I could see was a paedophile. The mother was also clearly uncomfortable as she grabbed the child from the man. Look, maybe he meant well… or not.

But his behaviour was the modus operandi of a paedophile – he was too affectionate. Kana these people start off kissing people’s children and then next they start touching them inappropriately ba itekanya a mmitsa mosadi wa gagwe. A re, Suna papa…Heedu, tlerere!

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